August 26, 2015

Most Czechs Not Looking Forward to Sex on Vacation

Sex on Vacation 3According to a survey, among one-third of Czech women and one-fifth of men the most preferred vacation activity is sunbathing. Four out of ten are also looking forward to their vacation for sex. – Czech News Agency, August 18, 2015

Here’s a sampling of comments by the other six out of ten Czechs:

“Yeah, there’s certainly nothing as pleasant as having sex when you‘re sunburned. Ow!”

“When exactly are we supposed to have sex? We’re sharing a hotel room with our kids, for God’s sake. Also, I don’t really find Legoland to be particularly sexy.”

“It’s hard to think about sex when I’m on vacation at the sea. Have you seen what my husband looks like in a bathing suit?”

“Having sex with my wife? Is that what you call a vacation?”

“Does lying next to my husband at the pool and fantasizing about having sex with the other men at the pool count?”

“It’s pretty hard to have sex after those all-you-can-eat hotel buffet dinners.”

“There’s not much time for sex when we’re on vacation, because our schedule is usually pretty full. We’re from Moravia, so our program is more or less the same every day: drunk by noon, then a nap, then dinner, then drunk again by 8 p.m. and asleep by 9.”

“Of course we‘re both looking forward to having sex on vacation, but that probably won’t happen until after our divorce is finalized.”

“I really don’t care whether we have sex on our vacation or not. I just hope that getting out of the country for a while will finally make my husband stop talking about those damned refugees!”

“My vacation is not about sex at all. It’s about leaving my husband at home with the kids while I lie on a beach for two weeks doing absolutely nothing. Heaven!”

“We’ve been married for 20 years. So, ‘looking forward’ to sex is already basically all we do.”

“Um, I’m pretty sure that sex is not part of the program at the seaside retreat the Cardinal has organized for us priests.”

“Well, you see, the thing is, we’re from Ostrava, where having sex is pretty much the only thing there is to do. So, actually, we’re just looking forward to two weeks of rest before we have to return home and starting having constant sex again.”

“Am I looking forward to sex on my vacation? No. Why do you ask such a question? Just because I’m an older getleman traveling alone to Thailand? Does that necessarily mean I’m going there for sex? Certainly not. Why, I’m going there to see the culture! In fact, I’m planning to visit that famous temple, the… um… what’s it called? Oh, right. The Angkor Wat. What’s that? It’s in Cambodia? Well, my goodness. Then I guess I’ll just have to find something else to do there, won’t I?”

 

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